CraZeee Tuesday becoming a little less CraZee.

Brent came to bed last night telling me that Hunter received his Arrow of Light last night at the pack meeting neither of us were at.  Ahh, the guilt!  I am so proud of him that he earned this all on his own, in fact we had no idea he was getting it last night or that he had completed the requirements for it.  I am so grateful for Hunter and what a responsible kid he his. (I wish I had a cheesy picture of him in his uniform to insert here but I don't!) He is so on top of it and takes care of himself so well that I almost feel neglectful as a mother.  Case in point, this morning when I came downstairs he was dressed, ready for school, Buoy was fed and let out and Hunter had made his own breakfast.  He was sitting on the couch reading a book.  I do wish I could get him to practice in the morning but he is too worried about waking everyone up(despite me telling him that we need to be woken up).  Granted, I did have to tell him to change his shirt since he wore it yesterday, but let's not get carried away...he is still an 11 year old boy.

So yesterday was my last time teaching my 7:30pm CorePower 2 class and when I left I realized that I forgot to announce this to my students and I was feeling really sad about my choice to give this class up in order to make more space in my life.  I was second guessing my decision because I love how I feel while teaching and afterwards and although I still have  a C1 on Wednesdays I am now down to only one class at CorePower and may not qualify for free yoga unless I teach 2 a week.  The catch 22 is that I don't have time to actually practice for myself, but if I were teaching less then I could do more of my own yoga.

Tuesdays are our CRAZY, CraZE days.  Both Sienna and Hunter came home from school yesterday and were crying and upset that it was Tuesday.  Sienna said that she remembered on the bus that it was Tuesday and that she started crying because she hates being in the car(she gets carsick).  It broke my heart.  This has happened every Tuesday since school started.  They melt down and then I put them back together, give them a snack and then off we go...to Gymnastics(Sienna), we wait in the car for an hour, doing homework, and then it's off to Cello(Hunter), back to Gymnastics to pick Sienna up and drop Ayla off, back to Cello while we listen to the last 25 minutes of Hunter's lesson and Sienna does her homework and then we go home. I give the keys and a kiss to Brent and he drives with the kids the 20 minutes back to gymnastics to get Ayla.  Hunter and I eat something, and change, me into my yoga clothes and Hunter into his scout shirt(complaining that we haven't gotten him a new boy scout one and that he has to wear the navy cub scout shirt, we are such awful parents) and then I leave 10 minutes before Hunter has to walk through the back gate to scouts.  And I feel badly about it every time, even though he feels big.  Brent gets home with the kids at 7:30, feeds them and puts them to bed.  He has gotten really good at cleaning the kitchen, scriptures and prayer, teeth, but remembering to have the kids pack a lunch and pick out their clothes always escapes his memory, despite my reminder notes!  So the repercussions of Tuesday carry over into Wednesday morning.

And this is the reason I decided to give up my class.  I have asked my kids if they want to give up their lesson or scouts and none of them do.  And so that left me to give up mine.  When I told Brent, I had requested someone to take it over he asked me why.  I thought he would be a bit more relieved or excited but he said that it was working and though it was crazy we were making it happen.  He is so supportive it amazes me at times.  And then I started thinking maybe I should have kept it because I have to come home for Hunter to get to scouts anyway and that still means Brent has to make the trip to get Ayla and so I might as well go and teach.  And I thought I would have a few more weeks with my class but finding a replacement happened within days instead of weeks like I had planned.  In the end I think the timing was just right.  I had arranged a sub for next week since Brent will be gone and I can't physically do that Crazy day on my own and it turns out that the same person subbing is taking my class permanently.   It is a great transition time, I kept telling myself.

And then Brent came to bed and told me we missed Hunter's Pack meeting and that he was given his Arrow of Light.  And I felt like an awful, terrible, slacker of a mother and yet I also felt much better about the decision I made.  Because now we won't have to miss any more pack meetings, at least one of us will be able to go.  And in the end my kids are my priority.  I am relieved to have a little bit of the weight of Tuesdays removed and if I can feel that then perhaps it will trickle down to the kids as well.

My theme in class was about Character and Being what we want to be and I read this quote,"  We Become what we want to Be by consistently Being what we want to Become each day." -Elder Richard G. Scott.  I want more quality time with my children and more Gratitude in my thoughts and words and actions.  I am content with the choice I made and how it will give me a way to accomplish this desire.  I have so much to be grateful for that it overwhelms me, especially this week, but that's an another story.

What a long, rambling, boring post. Congrats if you read it all.  I just had to get that out!